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You will always try to keep the man you have near you and have the most beautiful relationship ever. Here are some tips which will help you accomplish your dream:

www.tips4girls.net



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by Greg Landry, M.S.

Growing children need certain essential nutrients in order to obtain mature healthy bodies. However, a lot of youngsters are missing some of the key nurturing elements in their diet. Calcium, fiber, magnesium, vitamin E, and potassium are some of the most important ingredients for a growing body.

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by Steve Pavlina

One of the most difficult matters to confront with respect to family relationships is that you don’t control the entire relationship yourself. Whether the relationship thrives or withers isn’t up to you alone. As the saying goes, it takes two to tango.
When major family relationship problems are encountered, it’s common to attempt a control strategy. You try to get the other person to change. Sometimes this approach works, especially if your request and the other person are both reasonable. But many times it just leads to frustration.
On the other hand, if you can’t change the other person, maybe you should just accept them as they are. That’s another strategy that sometimes works, but this one can also lead to frustration and even resentment if your needs aren’t being met.

family1 There is, however, a third alternative for those times when changing the other person and accepting the other person as-is are both unworkable for you. And that option is to change yourself in a way that solves the problem. This requires that you redefine the problem as an internal one instead of an external one, and then the solution will take the form of an expansion of your awareness and/or a change in your beliefs.
An internal way of viewing relationship problems is that they reflect back to you a part of yourself that you dislike. If you have a negative external relationship situation, it’s a reflection of a conflict in your own thinking. As long as you keep looking outside yourself for the answer, you may never resolve the external problem. But once you start looking inside yourself for the problem, it may become easier to solve.
What you’ll find when you tackle such problems is that you harbor one or more beliefs that perpetuate the relationship problem in its current form. Those beliefs are the real problem — the true cause of the unhealthy relationship.
For example, consider a problematic relationship between yourself and another family member. Suppose you hold the belief that you must be close to every family member simply because they’re related to you. Perhaps you’d never tolerate this person’s behavior if it came from a stranger, but if the person is a relative, then you tolerate it out of a sense of duty, obligation, or your personal concept of family. To push a family member out of your life might cause you to feel guilty, or it could lead to a backlash from other family members. But genuinely ask yourself, “Would I tolerate this behavior from a total stranger? Why do I tolerate it from a family member then?” Exactly why have you chosen to continue the relationship instead of simply kicking the person out of your life? What are the beliefs that perpetuate the problematic relationship? And are those beliefs really true for you?
I love my parents and siblings unconditionally (I have two younger sisters and one younger brother). However, I haven’t had a particularly close-knit relationship with any of them for many years. There was no major falling out or anything like that — it’s just that my personal values and lifestyle have moved so far from theirs that there isn’t enough basic compatibility to form a strong common bond anymore. My parents and siblings are all of the employee mindset with a very low tolerance for risk, but as an entrepreneur, risk is my favorite breakfast. My wife and kids and I are all vegan, while my parents and siblings celebrate the holidays with the traditional consumption of animals. I don’t recall anyone in my family ever saying, “I love you,” while I grew up, but with my own kids I’m very affectionate and strive to tell them I love them every day. My parents and siblings are all practicing Catholics, but I left that behind 17 years ago in order to explore other belief systems. (Technically within their belief system, I’m doomed to hell, so that sorta puts a damper on things.) Even though this is the family I grew up with and shared many memories, our core values are so different now that it just doesn’t feel like a meaningful family relationship anymore.
Despite all these differences, we’re all on good terms with each other and get along fairly well, but our differences create such a big gap that we have to settle for being relatives without being close friends.

family If you operate under the belief that family is forever and that you must remain loyal to all your relatives and spend lots of time with them, I want you to know that those beliefs are your choice, and you’re free to embrace them or release them. If you’re fortunate enough to have a close family that is genuinely supportive of the person you’re becoming, that’s wonderful, and in that situation, you’ll likely find the closeness of your family to be a tremendous source of strength. Then your loyalty to family closeness will likely be very empowering.
On the other hand, if you find yourself with family relationships that are incompatible with your becoming your highest and best self, then excessive loyalty to your family is likely to be extremely disempowering. You’ll only be holding yourself back from growing, from achieving your own happiness and fulfillment, and from potentially doing a lot of good for others. If I retained a very close relationship with my birth family, it would be like putting a lampshade over my spirit. I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
My way of dealing with my family situation was to broaden my definition of family. On one level I feel an unconditional connection with all human beings, but on another level, I see people with whom I share a deep compatibility as my true family. For example, my wife and I both have a strong commitment to doing good for the planet as best we can, which is one reason we each find each other attractive. And that’s partly why she’s my best friend as well as my wife. When I see people who are living very, very consciously and deliberately and who’ve dedicated their lives to the pursuit of a worthy purpose, I have a strong sense that on some level, those people are members of my family. And this connection feels more real to me than the blood relationships I was born into.
Loyalty is a worthy value, but what does it mean to be loyal to one’s family? Since loyalty is very important to me, I had to refine my view of this concept to place loyalty to my highest and best self above loyalty to the people I was born with. That was a difficult mental shift to make, but in the long run it has given me a sense of peace. I realize now that family is a concept which is capable of extending far beyond blood.
What I’m suggesting is that in order to solve family relationship problems, which exist at one level of awareness, you may need to pop your consciousness up a level and take a deeper look at your values, beliefs, and your definitions of terms like loyalty and family. Once you resolve those issues at the higher level, the low level relationship problems will tend to take care of themselves. Either you’ll transcend the problems and find a new way to continue your relationship without conflict, or you’ll accept that you’ve outgrown the relationship in its current form and give yourself permission to move on to a new definition of family.
You see… when you say goodbye to a problematic relationship issue, you’re really saying goodbye to an old part of yourself that you’ve outgrown. As I became less compatible with my birth family, I also gradually dropped parts of myself that no longer served me. I drifted away from rigid religious dogma, from fear of risk-taking, from eating animals, from negativity, and from being unable to say, “I love you.” As I let all of those things pass from my consciousness, my external-world relationships changed to reflect my new internal relationships.

familie_kinder As within, so without. If you hold onto conflict-ridden relationships in your life, the real cause is your inner attachment to conflict-ridden thoughts. When you alter the mental relationships within your own mind, your physical world will change to reflect it. So if you kick negative thoughts out of your head, you will find yourself simultaneously kicking negative people out of your life.
There is a wonderful rainbow at the end of this process of letting go, however. And that is that when you resolve conflicts in your consciousness that cause certain relationships to weaken, you simultaneously attract new relationships that resonate with your expanded level of consciousness.
We attract into our lives more of what we already are. If you don’t like the social situation you find yourself in, stop broadcasting the thoughts that attract it. Identify the nature of the external conflicts you experience, and then translate them into their internal equivalents. For example, if a family member is too controlling of you, translate that problem into your own internal version: You feel your life is too much out of your control. When you identify the problem as external, your attempted solutions may take the form of trying to control other people, and you’ll meet with strong resistance. But when you identify the problem as internal, it’s much easier to solve. If another person exhibits controlling behavior towards you, you may be unable to change that person. However, if you feel you need more control in your life, then you can actually do something about it directly without needing to control others.
I’ll actually go so far as to say that the purpose of human relationships may be the expansion of consciousness itself. Through the process of identifying and resolving relationship problems, we’re forced to deal with our internal incongruencies. And as we become more conscious on the inside, our relationships expand towards greater consciousness on the outside.
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/



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Being very important and sensitive, the relationship between parents and children can bring us a lot of joy or difficulties. It is completely true that both parents and children love each other. However sometimes establishing the relationship becomes a real challenge. The reasons can be different: lack of proper knowledge, parents’ overt hovering, age gap, conflicts of interest and so on.

Sometimes the conditions become so severe that both of them do not even prefer to spent time with each other. The reason is not that they do not love each other but to show that they are disappointed with the behavior of each other. It is not anticipated that the things will totally change. But still both parents and children can enhance their relationship to a great extent.

Here you can find some tips that can really assist both children and parents to cope up with the adverse situations. Be sure, with permanent effort from both the sides this vital relationship can be improved soon.

No pressure and orders
First of all, it is important that parents should not pressurize their children. Try to remain cheerful in front of your children. This is applicable to parents as well. Do not mess up with each other in the presence of children. Domestic violence is definitely not good for the children mental health.

Parents should not try to give orders to their children. You can convince them that discipline they are pursuing today will certainly be fruitful for their future. Children should accompany their parents if they are going for a walk and try to have a heart to heart talk about their problems, issues and expectations. Don’t be a boss, you’ll get much more pleasure and peace being a friend to your child.

Explain the rules
There are rules at school, in the workplace, at home and in society. There are written rules and unwritten rules. They all have a purpose – to allow everyone to live together in harmony and to protect everyone’s rights. Surely, being adult you understand that. However, your children are not so experienced. Sometimes (or very often) they don’t understand the limitations your set. Be patient. When setting the rule, spend 10 minutes to show your children its general aim, make an example, discuss possible problems, caused by non-fulfillment of the rule.

Let your child help you
Sometimes you miss excellent opportunities to make relationship closer by not allowing your child to help you with various activities and tasks. Choosing which bag looks better with your shoes or suit lets a child know you value his opinion. Making simple home tasks jointly with your child is a good ground for communication. Certainly, if you ask your child to help you, be prepared to accept and live with the result!

Eat as a family
It is not a trifle! Eating together makes you closer and sets the stage for sharing and discussion. Just don’t let TV interrupt your communication. Talk and enjoy each other. It can become a time most appreciated and remembered by parents and child.

Express your feelings
Don’t be shy to tell your child you love him — no matter his age. On hard days or after a quarrel, when you don’t exactly “like your child” at that moment, it is so important express your love. Let your child be aware of your real feelings in tough situations still stressing on your intention to have peace in your family.

Unfortunately, you can’t completely avoid disagreements with your child. Even in this situation try to imagine yourself in his position and stick to the following rules:

For sure, parenting is a quiet tough job, however maintaining trust relationships helps you stay connected with your child through all stages of his upbringing.



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“One of the tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon, instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today.” ~ Dale Carnegie

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So true it is! How many of us really take the time to “stop and smell the roses”? Most of us spend way too much time living in our minds, either thinking about the future or the past, going through life as sleepwalkers. Time meanwhile waits for no one. Before we know it, the years have passed. What have we missed? A whole lot! Maybe the better part of our lives. But it’s never too late to grab on to life and start living it for all it’s worth! “Smelling the roses” is really talking about living in the here and now. It means enjoying the air we pump into our lungs with every breath. It means getting out of our heads and truly becoming a part of the world around us. It means tasting the food we eat, seeing the faces of the strangers we pass on the street every day. It means being truly alive. Gloriously, vibrantly, alive! But were not talking about roses. We’re talking about relationships! We’re talking about truly being with the one we love!

Are you and your lover strangers living under the same roof? Or are you both truly there for each other? Do each of you listen to what the other has to say with focused attention, really hearing what they are trying to communicate? Or do you sometimes drift away, or instead of really listening, be thinking about what you are going to say when it is your turn to talk? Do you stay visually focused on each other when conversing?

A strong relationship means being together! It means sharing life’s experiences together, exploring new territory together, growing as people together. It means learning to communicate better together! So if you or your lover’s routine is to come home from work, turn on the TV maybe it’s time to think about putting on some soft music, lighting a candle and just both stopping long enough to relax together instead. Talk about your day, good news about the children, your plans for a fun weekend, whatever. But most importantly just be together! This is not the time to talk about bills or your “honey do” list. This is the time to unwind, to take a fresh look at the person you are living with, your life’s companion,and enjoy each other’s company!

So don’t spend the rest of your life trapped inside your mind “lost in thought” or drugged out by television. Make it a point to start seeing, being with and truly enjoying those beautiful human beings who live in your house with you! Time is short and sometimes shorter than we know. So no matter how hard your day has been and how badly you feel the need to unwind and relax, be sure to make the time to say hello to that little puppy wiggling with unconditional love, to give hugs to those rambunctious children who literally live for your love, companionship and attention. And above all take the time to really hold each other, feel each other’s warmth, feel the vibrant energy coursing through both your bodies, to taste, feel and smell the one you love!

A wise man once said, “The time we spend living in the here and now is the only time our body is healing itself, energizing itself. A time when we do not age and the only time we are truly alive.” Learning to live in the here and now is not easy. Some folks climb sheer rock faces to dizzying heights, using only their bare hands. They say that one of the main reasons they do it is because it brings them totally into the here and now! Makes them feel incredibly alive!

Something about being on the edge of death does that to people. The same goes for athletes focused on the game, musicians on stage before an audience, folk intent on a hobby, and that perfect moment at the pinnacle of lovemaking when nothing else exists but you and your lover! You get the idea.

In Aldous Huxley’s book “Island” the parrots that live in the tropical paradise he describes are trained to squawk, “Attention! be here now!” as a means of reminding residents of the importance of living life this way. So don’t despair. Practice makes perfect. The more you remember to live in the here and now, even though it may only be once a day for a few moments or once a week, the sooner you will find this incredible state of being becoming natural to you!

When you sit down at the table for a meal, empty your mind of everything but the food and the beautiful human beings you are “breaking bread” with! When you go to watch the kids do sports or music or perform in a play, forget the rest of the world and fully enjoy the experience. As for television, watching an uplifting or romantic program together can be a wonderful thing for two people to share. Just don’t leave it on as background noise! Just watch when people in a room where a TV is on trying to have a conversation, even if they haven’t been watching. Their eyes will constantly turn away from the person talking and fix on the TV screen. It’s that addictive! And when you are making love, totally be with your lover, not fantasizing about some dream lover. (Although fantasy can be a powerful tool to spice up your lovemaking). So learn to live each day like it is the last. But above all… truly live!

By Robert West

www.mynippon.com



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Career? Or children?…

January 15, 2009 by Olgita

Hard question for some young mothers. You might be willing to spend as much time with your child as possible, see how she grows, becomes different, learns to talk and do things, changes your life… But you might also be willing to grow as a professional, to develop your skills and realize your potential. Are these desires possible to combine? Sure, they are! Let’s just review a couple of examples.

Recently I stumbled upon the story of Aisha Thomas, 23, graduated in 2006 with a law degree. She planned to start a career with a commercial law firm but her priorities changed when she became pregnant. Her will to build a secure future for her and her son Tacari was implemented in building her own business. She has big plans, having already set up Chocolate Gifts 4 U, producing personalised chocolates, and has launched her website www.chocolategifts4U.com.

In the build-up to starting her business and since its launch Aisha has accessed lots of help through the Prince’s Trust and has also enjoyed great support from her family.

She is already expanding her range to include boxes of Belgian chocolates prepared to individual requirements and says her future goal is to design her own chocolate collection. In the longer term her dream is a chain of personalised chocolate shops with cafes.

Aisha’s advice to other would-be entrepreneurs is simple. “Life is short. If you have a dream or passion give it a go! You only get one chance.”

Great example, don’t you think? It is really good news that the Internet has revolutionized the career world, making it much more feasible for mothers to work from home; Many maintain part-time careers or become entrepreneurs. Such ventures give mothers the opportunity to benefit from the convenience, flexibility and supplemental income of a career without having to work in the office everyday. It also makes the transition back into the workforce a bit easier in case you are not eager to make your own business but be a part of a company instead.

I am continually amazed at how hard it is for most paralegals to find the right situations. The issue is not finding work. It is finding work that fits into your life rather than consumes it.

Another opportunity – there are many of the paralegal job listings are for offices that are high pressure environments and they want someone full time. If you are interested in raising a family and being there and don’t have your heart set on completely being consumed by your career, you might be better off in a home based self-employed situation.

You’ll find a lot of great success-stories here – http://www.internetbasedmoms.com/. And if you have your own story – we’ll be happy if you share it with us. It is always great to hear some inspiring stories, makes me feel better about myself as well :)



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by Susan Chen

With the chill descending in the November air, your excitement builds as you realize that December is just around the corner, and that it is almost time for the greatest celebration of the year… CHRISTMAS!

The Significance Of Christmas Gifts

Christmas celebration is a time of family get-togethers, and also the giving and sharing of Christmas gifts. This tradition that began with the three wise men offering precious gifts to the infant Jesus still continues all over the world to this day.

For many people, some of life’s most cherished memories are often related to Christmas and the giving and sharing of Christmas presents with loved ones. How can anyone forget the night of eager anticipation on Christmas Eve for the family gathering and the opening of Christmas presents?

So Christmas gifts are an integral part of the joyful celebration of Christmas. The gifts received from our friends and loved ones over the years make up some of the sweetest memories.

What Makes For The Best Christmas Gift?

Perhaps the world famous short story of O Henry ‘The Gift of the Magi’ best explains what makes for the ideal Christmas gift. One has to surpass his self to reflect his true emotion through gifts.

Why is it that some Christmas presents remain so close to our hearts? It is definitely not because of the material value of the gift, but because it is the giver’s sentiments and feelings behind the gift that makes it so meaningful and dear to our heart. And if you want to express your feelings through Christmas presents, it is a good idea to add some personalized touches to them.

Remember These Points When Choosing The Ideal Christmas Gift For A Special Person:

* Expense has nothing to do with the value of the gift; how much thought you have put into choosing and preparing the Christmas present makes it that much more special.

* Keep the recipient in mind when selecting and purchasing the gift; a gorgeous evening gown may enthrall your sweetheart, but for your aged mother, you have to think a bit more creatively. Why not search for a childhood family picture and frame it with an exquisite photo frame and present this to her as her Christmas gift! It will surely bring tears to your mother’s eyes, but rest assured they would be tears of happiness.

* Last of all nothing can beat the sweet feeling of reading a handmade Christmas card with heartfelt and personal good wishes to your friends and dear ones.

http://www.stepfamily.asn.au



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94,232 more boys than girls were born in 2002. This is the latest finding of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s (CDC) “Trend Analysis of the Sex Ratio at Birth in the United States,” which measured the sex ratio at birth for more than the past 60 years.If that statistic surprised you, you’ll be even more surprised to learn that an average of 91,685 more male babies have been born each year than females from 1940 to 2002. That means a total of 5,776,130 more boys were born during that period.
Even though more boys are born, some say male births are actually decreasing.

The CDC pointed out a few other interesting findings on the ratio of boys to girls, too:

Older Moms and Teen Moms: Women in their 40s had the lowest ratio of boys to girls while late-teen moms had the highest.

Number of children: The more children a woman has, the more likely she’ll have an equal number of girls and boys

Ethnicity: Chinese women had the highest ratio of boys to girls, followed by Filipino women, while American Indian moms had the lowest.

Other factors that may impact the ratio include older fathers, stress, environmental toxins and lower maternal weight, says the CDC.

During development, boys are more fragile than girls.

What’s the Norm?

Although these statistics may seem alarming at first glance, they are well within the “normal” worldwide ratios, even at the extremes. Globally, there are about 105-107 boys born for every 100 girls.

At the highest sex birth ratio in the United States, which occurred in 1946, there were about 105.9 boys born per 100 girls; and at the lowest sex birth ratio (in 2001), there were about 104.6 boys born per 100 girls. There were 104.8 boys born in 2000 for every 100 girls.

For comparison, in China, where couples are only allowed to have one child, the gender balance has become alarmingly skewed and millions of men may be forced to remain bachelors because of the shortage of women.

“This is a seriously dangerous ratio,” said Ren Yuling, a delegate to the Chinese People’s Political Consultative Committee. “The numbers mean that some people will never have their needs for a spouse met, so they move into dangerous territory.”

Just what is China’s sex birth ratio? In 2000, there were 116.9 boys born for every 100 girls.

Why are more boys naturally born than girls? The New York Times offered some clues in an article called, “The Weaker Sex.” Although more boys are born, it appears they may be more susceptible to a host of diseases, injuries and more, and soon women actually outnumber men. Here are just a few of their findings:

Facts on Females Living Longer & Stronger

  • Male births slightly outnumber female births, but boys have a higher death rate if born premature: 22 percent compared with 15 percent for girls.
  • Overall, more newborn males die than females (5 to 4).
  • Sudden infant death syndrome is one and a half times more common in boys than girls.
  • As teenagers, boys die at twice the rate of girls.
  • Men have fewer infection-fighting T-cells and are thought to have weaker immune systems than women.
  • By the age of 36, women outnumber men.
  • Stroke, cancer, diabetes, heart disease and accidents–all among the top causes of death–kill men at a higher rate than women.
  • American men typically die almost six years before women do.
  • By the age of 100, women outnumber men eight to one.

During fetal development “the male sex is clearly the more fragile one,” said Bruce B. Allan, an obstetrician-gynecologist in Calgary, Alberta Canada.

Between 1970 and 1990, the proportion of male births decreased 1 percent.

Is the Number of Boys Actually DECREASING?

The CDC study above doesn’t touch on another CDC finding, this one released in 2002, that birth rates overall had hit an all-time low. The birth rate fell to 13.9 per 1,000 persons in 2002, down from 14.1 per 1,000 in 2001. This is a full 17 percent decrease in births from 1990, when rates reached 16.7 per 1,000 people.

Take that finding, coupled with the fact that a study by Allan and his colleagues found that, from 1930 to 1990, the male sex ratio had dropped by about 1 boy per 1,000 births. Though older parents, fertility drugs and certain diseases have all been linked to an increasing proportion of female births, Michelle B. Gottlieb of the World Resources Institute (WRI), says the findings “suggest that avoidable, [likely] environmental, factors may be playing a role.”

Pollutants that mimic human hormones, including dioxin have become ubiquitous in the environment and may be affecting births. For instance, in 1976, an industrial accident released high levels of dioxin into the environment near Seveso, Italy. Of the nine couples who received the highest exposure, 12 daughters were born–and no sons. Among four couples who had lower blood levels of dioxin, “The male-female ratio approached normal,” said Larry L. Needham of the Atlanta CDC.

Devra Lee Davis, a program director at WRI believes that the declining male birth ratio “should be viewed as a sentinel health event,” an indicator that environmental hazards difficult to detect by other means do exist and should be dealt with.

But there are other theories too. A study in the journal of the American Medical Association found that high exposures to certain pesticides could interfere with a father’s ability to produce sperm cells with Y chromosomes–the kind needed for boys.

And, another study found that women who eat PCB-contaminated fish (PCBs, or polychlorinated biphenyls, can mimic female sex hormones) are less likely to give birth to boys. The women who were exposed to the highest levels of PCBs (just by eating contaminated fish) had about 50 percent fewer boys compared with women who had been exposed to the lowest levels.

So even though over 94, 000 more boys than girls are born in the United States each year, it seems it’s the boys we need to worry about–in the two decades between 1970 and 1990, the proportion of male births went down an entire 1 percent

by www.SixWise.com



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